5 Steps to Killer Confidence

Wonder Woman walking confidently

Have you ever been in a room where a person walks in and by some sheer magical force they draw attention to themselves like white on rice? And, it seems like there’s no real reason for it, it just sort of happens.

There is a reason for it – confidence.

It’s why we love characters like Wonder Woman, Hermione Granger, and Arya Stark.

But what is it about confidence that makes it so attractive? Why is it that both men and women list ‘confidence’ as one of the top traits they look for in a partner. Why are we so enthralled with and motivated by people we perceive as being confident?

It’s because you unconsciously know that a person has to have a reason to back up the confidence they project.

Confidence is about knowing your strengths and abilities, and knowing how to bring those to the table.

confident girl slips on stage

Faking confidence is extremely difficult, and people that try to tend to give themselves away.  Even if the tells (behaviours that give a person away) aren’t obvious, they’re still there and people can pick that up.

You know that ‘off‘ feeling you have about someone even though they seem like they’re confident…yea that.

Even master fakers (think narcissist and sociopaths) eventually give themselves away because their ‘confidence’ is not congruent (in line with) their actions.

Your intuition can pick that up.

And this is why society marvels at those who are truly confident – because they can uphold that confidence based on their past actions.

And we love them for it, because past actions are really great indicators of future actions.

So, how can you become more confident?

There are many ways in which you can become confident, I’ll list some of the best confidence boosters next.

But not before I warn you of this:

I do not believe in the ‘fake-it-til-you-make-it’ way that many websites and ‘gurus’ suggest. When it comes to confidence specifically, it can create the opposite effect – because it make you feel like a fraud.  Which will lower your confidence level.

You don’t want that.

Not only that, false confidence usually comes across as arrogance.

You don’t want that either.

I believe in TAKING ACTION to build true confidence, and this is how you do it:

1. Groom Yourself

lack of confidence in the shower meme

You’d be surprised at how much impact this one step has on your self-image.

A nice hot shower, blow-drying your hair, and maybe a little mascara can go a LONG way in improving how you feel about yourself.

I’m not saying you need to do yourself up like you’re hitting up the red carpet at the Oscars, what I am saying is some basic hygiene like showering regularly, shaving, doing your hair, keeping your nails clean (no biting!!) will tremendously improve how you feel about yourself.

You appearance communicates messages about you to others.

It’s a display of your level of self-care and your mindset.

But don’t forget more importantly, you’re also sending this message to yourself– every time you see yourself in the mirror.

So, the better your grooming practices the better the feedback you’ll get from your own reflection – and that little boost you get when you see yourself looking clean and fresh in the mirror will make you feel awesome about yourself.

2. Know Thyself

The most powerful you’ll ever be, is when you finally discover who you truly are – and embrace her!

This means the good and the bad, the strengths and weaknesses.

To only focus on the good and strong within in you – is a weakness.

To be strong, you must accept the darker elements of your existence.

You are not a perfect being, and neither am I.  None of us are. It is what makes us human, and it is what makes us whole.

Yin and yang

To reject a part of yourself, even the negative is to reject your humanity.  And when you do that, you become vulnerable and susceptible to those weaknesses.

That is when your weakness have power over you.

Discover what your weakness are, and integrate them into your life.

Know how to manage them, and they will lose their power over you.

Not only that, anyone you come across who may have used them against you for personal gain is now at a loss, because you are in charge of them, they’re not in charge of you.

3. Set Clear and Specific Goals ON PAPER

One of the most profound steps you can take towards changing your life and increasing your confidence is to write your goals down on paper.

No, not in your phone.  ON PAPER.

When you write something on paper, it’s like casting a spell.  There is a mystical element at play when you write something down.

You are taking something that is within in you, and putting it outside of you.

It is the first step to literally manifesting your dreams.

Write it down!

4. Acknowledge Your Past Accomplishments

confident anchorman

Reflecting on your past wins is a great way to boost your confidence.

It’s easy to forget the amazing things we’ve done in the past, especially when we’re distracted by things that may not be going so well at the moment.

Write out things you are proud of in your past – this could be things you’ve accomplished, things you’re grateful for, things you appreciate that happened which are positive.

Gratitude and appreciation for your past accomplishments and actions will instantly boost your confidence level, because in a moment of low it’ll bring clarity about how awesome you really are and what you’re actually capable of.

5. Step Outside of Your Comfort Zone

confident rose slings arnold

If you don’t step outside of your comfort zone, you’ll be stagnant and so will your level of confidence.

You build confidence by venturing into the unknown, taking chances and risks, and living a life based on your core values – trusting that you will create the outcome that you want.

The only way to do that, is to consistently step outside of what’s familiar, what’s comfortable, what’s the same-old-same-old.

Challenging yourself is the most authentic way to build your confidence and your character.


At this point, if you’re ready to action towards transforming your life join my program Scaling Victories.

If not, that’s okay too.

At the very least, you just learned some valuable info on how to boos your confidence!

Ultimately this program is for people who take action and are ready to take their life to the next level.

Click the button below to join the program.